Sunday, December 9, 2012

Where Is Your Comfort Found?

It's a question that I'm going to intentionally ask myself daily.  Where is my comfort found?  The answer SHOULD be Jesus but to be honest, it's been food.  Food is something that I have developed a relationship with over the years.  And with that relationship, there's been a dependence and addiction formed.  Yep, addicted to food.  You may be wondering, "what kind of person gets addicted to food?" "What a weirdo..."  I really don't care if you think that or not.  Harsh?  Perhaps, but I've wasted entirely too much time in life being overly concerned with how others perceive me.  No more.  Sin, past, food, others, acceptance and etc do not define me.  Jesus does.  He was born and died for us all.  So the question is, why do we live as though it was menial? My body should be a temple.  God didn't send his one and only son to die on the cross for me to live like be a slave to food or my selfish desires.  I owe it to Him to live a full life, bringing Him glory.

My blog is going to be a place to document this process again.  It offers a sense of accountability and is therapeutic in the way of letting thoughts go free.  I'm currently reading a book by Candace Cameron Bure called "Reshaping It ALL" and it's been convicting yet encouraging.  She quotes a lot of scripture and points out that we turn to food for comfort as opposed to Christ.  There's something to be said for willpower and living intentional.  "Change must begin with the transformation by the Spirit - the renewing of our minds." I have to continually be renewing my heart in Christ throughout the day, allowing Him to renew and change me.  With that, finding comfort in only Him. 

Why turn to food?  I'm still not entirely sure but looking back it seems as though I let the enjoyment found in food bring me comfort over the years when I would get sad, nervous, happy, mad or lonely.  It became an idol over time and I refused to accept it.  Choosing what and how much I hate gave me a sense of control when I knew other things weren't going like I had planned or hoped.  I have known the steps to take and even take them from time to time but then I find a way to opt out and I take it.  I allowed my past to define me and determine my future.  No more.  The past attempts are irrelevant.  What matters is turning this over to God and refusing to give into my flesh.  Easier said than done but it is more than possible.

1 Corinthians 9:27 says, "I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified."  I absolutely LOVE encouraging others and want to be able to help those that struggle.  While my goal is of course to look great, I want to be healthy and be able to honor God with my body because He has saved me physically on many occasions but most importantly, spiritually. 

This journey is going to be difficult and painful at times because I'll learn things about myself that God wants changed but to quote a line from a song that Kimberly and I wrote years back, "No one ever said it would be easy...."