Now, why did I just tell you that? It isn't because I am angry with him for that or that I'm holding a grudge. His opinion wasn't the kicker for me but his words left an impact that made me even more aware of my physical imperfections on my face. Some might think I'm vain for it but when I have ever not been transparent here? I told you that in hopes that you'll see that we all have scars. Some are seen by the human eye and others are so deep and buried in us with the fear that someone will see them and find us hideous of foolish. I've seen people that have been hurt by the church and those in leadership. There are many who have been physically, verbally or sexually assaulted by someone they trusted or even someone they didn't even know.
Personally, most of my internal scars are from choices I made in relationships that left me feeling broken and ashamed and feeling that I wouldn't add up or be good enough or whole enough. That, in turn, led to more poor decisions in hopes that I'd fill some void that can only be fulfilled by Christ. Most of the physical ones I have are from the accident I mentioned above but I'm thankful for them (most days). They serve as a reminder that God is faithful and that He is who He says He is. He even used them as confirmation to Thomas. "Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” John 20:27 There was also joy within the disciples when he showed him his side and his hands in John 20:21-23. That convicted me today when I was thinking about how much I despise my internal (& sometimes external) scars and the way I let them get to me. Scars can be a reason to rejoice because the children of God have been redeemed. They are the result of healing that has either happened or is happening right this very moment. Can I get a WHAT WHAT?!?! It's a process though, and sometimes within it we are required to tend to that "injury" by being transparent, striving to learn from mistakes and even choosing to forgive.
When people notice my scars, I see it as an incredible opportunity to talk about God's faithfulness and how He protected me. When I meet with the college/career ladies and we talk about life, I use the scars from my past to encourage them and hopefully set an example of just what kind of healing God brings to his children. In the process of getting them, scars hurt like hell but what a beautiful story they can be used to tell.